I lost the ability to take pictures. Sure, I could still operate a camera, but something was off. I would be looking through the viewfinder, but there was no connection to the subject. I didn’t feel in tune with what I was photographing. Puzzled, I put the camera down and rubbed my head, nursing a dull headache. That headache was now on day three. Or, was it four or five? Maybe I was feeling stressed. That would explain the headaches and a lack of connectivity.
Two days later, I picked up the camera again. The headache was still there. I pointed the camera at the bulletin board in my office and tried to compose and focus. Something wasn’t right. No matter how I tried to focus the lens, the subject still felt disconnected. It just wouldn’t come into focus. Those words rolled around in my mind: wouldn’t come into focus. Into focus…..
Ah. I twiddled the diopter adjustment on the viewfinder, and guess what? I could see again. But, I never needed the diopter adjustment before. I ran into the restroom, and swapped my left contact lens with my right. And, the world become clear. For the past week, I had been wearing my contact lenses in the wrong eyes! That also explains the headaches. I felt like a doofus. But I didn’t mind one bit. With one minute of effort, I overcame both the headaches and my distance from the camera.
Interesting though, that it took a whole week to notice. Even though I couldn’t achieve a focused image in the camera’s viewfinder, I still didn’t guess that my eyes were off. I just assumed I had some kind of mental block. How subjective it must be to see something. How much needs to come together for me to take a specific picture? How much is going on physically and mentally that I’m not aware of? How much of these out-of-awareness criteria is holding me back from becoming a better photographer? How much of it enables me to be the photographer I already am?
January 29th, 2009 at 8:13 am
It’s interesting that on some level, you experienced switched contact lenses as an artistic malaise. Out of contact with your subject, cranky and headachey. I’ve often wondered if your unique relationship with your vision doesn’t predispose you to your art–make you more sensitive and likely to appreciate the visual world. Thanks for changing your comments filter/whatnot! -H
January 29th, 2009 at 2:54 pm
well Andy, I guess you could say that you were blind, but now you see. welcome back. your social network missed you. I think it’s probably a zero sum game. Yes, you feel more alive when you are on a walk-a-bout but others feel less alive because you are not there. What did the Beatles say? The love you take is equal to the love you make? (I probably butchered it but something close) Your friend, Marty